Top tips for keeping calm

Tags

anger, angry, assertive, bestie, bitterness, brisk walk, calm, calm reserves, calmer, children, concerns, confrontational, controlling, cool, crazy, cuppa, curb it, cure, day, depletes, disaster, emotion, escalate, exercise, Exercise = calm, feel good endorphins, fix, forgive and forget, funny, garden, gardening, GP, grown-ups, healthy, heart rate, heat of the moment, heightened emotions, help, hurting, irritated, lighter side, listen, listening to calming music, long baths, look after yourself, meditate, meditation, mess, moment, music, netball, normal, olive branch, positive, prevention, quiet, regret, report, short breaks, simple tips, speak, stronger, subsided, swim, talk, thing, thoughts, time, timeout, traffic, walk away, writing a journal

Keeping calm can be a challenge when time is tight and someone then cuts you up in traffic, closes a door on you or doesn’t deliver their report by an already extended deadline. Anger is a normal, even healthy emotion, but only if you deal with it in a positive way. We have some simple tips that could help you, help yourself.

Think before you speak
In the heat of the moment, it’s really easy to say something you will regret later, so take a moment or two to collect your thoughts before saying anything. Hopefully others will do the same, and the situation won’t escalate into a disaster.

Talk when you are calm
Once you have time to think about things, and your anger has subsided, it is easier to be assertive, and not confrontational. Talk over your concerns without hurting others or controlling them, and life will be easier and calmer and you will stay calm.

Take some timeout
We often think that timeout is just for children, but it is helpful for grown-ups too. Having short breaks during the day offers you a little bit of quiet and can stop you getting angry and irritated. Have a cuppa, walk in the garden, sit and meditate, or just listen to some music and you can catch up with yourself – prevention is better than cure when it comes to heightened emotions.

Exercise = calm
Taking time out to exercise is a brilliant way to look after yourself, and to keep calm. A brisk walk or run, a swim, game of netball or even an afternoon spent gardening, can get your heart rate going and those feel good endorphins will make you feel happy and calm rather than cross and bothered.

Look for solutions
It might seem easier to focus on what depletes your calm reserves, but a better use of your time would be looking to resolving the issues bothering you. Does your son’s mess drive you crazy? Then walk away and close the door, he can clean it up. Is your bestie always late when you meet up? Then take a book and catch up with some reading and make the most of the quiet. Anger doesn’t fix anything, but it can make you feel worse, so curb it and will be calmer and happier.

Don’t bear a grudge
You might not want to forgive and forget, but bitterness can make you feel even worse. Why not be the better person and reach out an olive branch and that way you might learn from the situation and grow calmer and stronger, rather than being angrier than ever.

Have a laugh
If you can to see the lighter side of what is going on, if you search harder enough even that mouldy sandwich on a plate left by your partner under the sofa, might seem funny…….might!

Try to relax
As well as taking some exercise, you can work on your anger by relaxing a little bit more than usual. Meditation, long baths, listening to calming music, writing a journal, doing some yoga or watching a funny movie could help take your mind of your worries and help you to relax.

Seek help if you need to
While anger is a normal emotion, if you are finding it hard to keep things in check and your calm has disappeared, speak to your GP and look at what help is out there so that you and others are safe and well.

Team Pure Beauty

Your summer reading list is here

Tags

America, another woman, Atlantic, bold, breathtaking book, clever, clothes, cocktail, commute, compelling story, crying, dreams, drift off to sleep, Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine, emotional, empowering and heartfelt, enchants and captives, end, England, Faking Friends by Jane Fallon, feel good novel, first novel, first page, flat, focus, free fall, fun, funny, Gail Honeyman, Gail O’Porter, glasses, great reads, hilarious, home, inspiring authors, Internet sensation, iPad, Julie Cohen, Kindle, laughing, limit, long-term relationship, love, lunch, marrying, meal deal, mission, modern day life, Monday to Friday, moving, murkey waters, pain, paperback, penny drops, poignant, powerful, raw, reader, relatable, resonate, secrets and lies, single mum, Sophie Kinsella, Special, story, success, suncream, Surprise Me, The Cows, tissues, twists and turns, vodka, weekend, work, world famous blogger

Whether it’s found in a paperback, Kindle or iPad, having a decent book to read can help take the pain out of the commute, give you a focus away from work or help you drift off to sleep at night.

There are some really great reads out there at the moment from some inspiring authors and thought we would share some of our favourites with you.

Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine might look like a simple read about a women who seems to lead a pretty normal life. She wears the same clothes to work every day, buys the same meal deal for lunch Monday to Friday and has a thing for vodka, but there’s nothing unusual about that. However, as a little bit of kindness and compassion comes into Eleanor’s life, a raw, emotional, compelling story unfolds and the twists and turns keep you turning every page of Gail Honeyman’s first novel, to the very end.

If you are looking for a book you will not want to put down, Gail O’Porter’s, The Cows is the one for you. This brilliant story captures and entwines the lives of three woman all navigating the murky waters of modern-day life in a fun, clever way that will resonate with readers on so many levels. A single mum who becomes an Internet sensation, a world-famous blogger and a grieving twin might not seem like a cocktail for success, but O’Porter has created something very special that must not be missed.

Julie Cohen is a gifted novelist and her latest book, Together, is a bold, breathtaking book that enchants and captives the reader from the first page to the last. Robbie and Emily have been together forever and have a love for one another that has no limit. The story crosses the Atlantic from America to England and Cohen goes back and forth and across the decades with ease and transparency to create a powerful, moving and truly beautiful tale. Be warned, tissues might be needed at the end as secrets and lies are uncovered.

If you are spending a day by the pool, pack your sun cream, glasses and Faking Friends by Jane Fallon and you are good to go. Amy was on the verge of marrying the man of her dreams but when she pays a surprise trip home to London from New York it becomes clear that another woman has been making herself at home in their flat. When the penny drops, and Amy realises her best has taken over her life but rather than go into free fall she sets out on a mission to get her own back and he journey is hilarious, empowering and heartfelt – don’t get sad, get better.

Sophie Kinsella is the goddess of good reads and her latest feel good novel, Surprise Me, will delight fans old and new. This is an emotionally charged, witty read about love and long-term relationship survival and questions just how well we know our nearest and dearest. Funny, poignant and relatable, this can’t put down read will have you laughing, crying and even questioning what you think is oh so safe in your life.

Got a summer read you want to share, let us know, we are all ears.

Team Pure Beauty

Easy way to meditate

Tags

ancient religious and spiritual traditions, body, breath, calm, chin, class, count, cushion, feet, funny, grass, group, head, legs, lie, mantra, meditate, meditation, mindfulness, modern living, mouth, nose, park, perfect, phone, scan, smile, stress, today, toes, transcendental meditation, triggers, you

There is no getting away from the fact that modern day living is stressful, and seems to be getting more so.

Whether you’re commuting on a packed train into the city, constantly trying to meet deadlines at work, or bringing up small children, pressures can mount up and getting time to unwind can be tricky.

However, relaxing is key if you want to get the balance right and whilst we all do that differently, something we can all incorporate in our lives is meditation.

The word meditation, comes from two Latin words: meditari (to think, to dwell upon, to exercise the mind) and mederi (to heal).

Meditation is a mind-body practice that can help improve anxiety and reduce symptoms of stress, leaving you feeling calmer and more in control. It isn’t just about focusing your mind but also looking at what’s going on inside you, so you can really start to understand yourself and the triggers that make you anxious.

There are various types of meditation with many coming from ancient religious and spiritual traditions but the two most common forms are mindfulness and transcendental meditation.

Mindfulness meditation is about focusing on your breathing and transcendental meditation involves repeating a mantra.

To feel the benefits of meditation you can start with as little as five minutes a day and build from there.

You can attend a group or class, which can be helpful when you are getting started, but we have some tips to get you started on your own.

Do it anywhere. Sitting, standing, lying down, on the train, or walking but the key is to be comfortable and focused. Find a chair you really like, sit on the floor with cushions, lie on the grass in the park – the choice is yours but make it work for you.

When you meditate, go distraction free. Turn off all devices, leave your phone in another room and try to make your space as tranquil as possible.

Be open-minded. Meditation works best when you have an open attitude as this makes it easier for thoughts and feelings to flow and for you to relax.

Breath. Once you are comfortable and ready, start to feel your breath as it comes into your body, through your nose and into your lungs. Count one on your first breath and two as you breathe out. Repeat to 10 and start again.

Scan you body. As you progress and are following your breath, start to focus your attention on your body, one part at a time. Start at the top of your head, down to your nose and chin. Feel the breath in your chest, your stomach and your legs. Move to your ankles, toes and finish with the soles of your feet. How do those feel?

Don’t worry you’re doing it wrong. There’s no perfect way to meditate, just do it and be happy you’re doing it.

Smile. Sounds funny we know, but when you’re finished, smile. Be grateful you had this time to yourself and you took time out for you.

Meditation isn’t always easy and it takes time and commitment, but the benefits can be amazing, so why not start today?