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How to put social media boundaries in place

22 Sat Feb 2020

Posted by Stark in Health and Happiness, Life and Fashion

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addictive, annoyed, attention, “If you can’t say something nice, bad day, bad habit, Be positive, Boss, boundaries, Checking social media, choice, constructive, conversation, criticism, detox, DM, don’t say anything at all”, drama, Facebook, feeds, friends, Good Vibes, groups, hours, Kick toxicity to the curb, life, mental wellness, nasty, negative, online, people, positive, posts, productivity, safe, sense of community, Set time limits, share, social media, social media free zone, solutions, strangers, time, time limit, twitter, validation, walk away

www.pexels.com While social media can be a place to bring people together and share ideas and dreams, it can also lead us down a darker path and take over life.

There might be a sense of community online, but the combination of overuse and the constant need for attention and validation can be detrimental to mental wellness and distracting when it comes to productivity.

We have some top tips around how you can set up your boundaries, so you keep safe online and take what you need from social media and keep the rest away.

Set time limits
Have a think about how long you are spending on social media at the moment each day and then consider what a reasonable amount of time might be.

Two hours?
An hour?
Thirty minutes?

This is for you to decide and we are all going to be different, but what is key here is that once you choose a time limit, stick to it. Keep an eye on your watch, and look at what else you are able to do that brings you back into the real world. Facebook will still be there when you go back and that Twitter DM can wait.

Kick toxicity to the curb
If you are reading posts from a person who is always negative or are in a group that is toxic, get away. We don’t need that in our lives be that in person or online, so go through your feeds, work out what and who aren’t doing you any favours and walk away. No need for this to be a drama, just let things slip away and feel good vibes come back.

Be positive
It’s an oldie but a goodie but “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all” is relevant when it comes to social media. Even if you’re speaking out against something, this can be done in a positive way if you offer alternative ideas and solutions rather than just throwing open a bag full of criticism. “I have another” can prevent discussions from becoming nasty and let you pass on your thoughts in a constructive way. Or, just move on and keep your thoughts to yourself rather than plastering it across IG for all to see.

Don’t give it all away
You might be having a bad day, you could’ve won the lottery, and your boss might have annoyed you, but you don’t have to put everything out there online. Yes, be part of the conversation but given that we don’t share everything in real life, you don’t want to let strangers know what’s up every second of the day.

Unplug
Checking social media can be a really bad habit, and an addictive one, but you do have a choice to decide when and how often you use it (see point one). Make one afternoon a week, or one day at the weekend a social media free zone and let your mind wander onto other things. Get outside, meet real friends, watch a movie or go to the beach and let the online world go on without you.

Team Pure Beauty

How to deal with a break up

23 Wed Jan 2019

Posted by Stark in Health and Happiness, Life and Fashion

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alone, angry, bed, betrayed, bike, blocking, boost your mood, bottle things up, break, break-up, broken heart, chatting, Christmas, cinema, coffee, confused, connected, cry, dance class, delete, distraction, dumped, easier, erased, Everybody hurts, ex, Facebook, facial, family, feel, feel good endorphins, feelings, friends, girl, GP, harsh, heal, holiday, home, Instagram, let go, love, love yourself, natural responses, nioce, once, pain, photo, quick fix, reboot, recluse, relationship, relationship status, run, sad, sad films, share, smile, social media, sorry, space, stress levels, sunshine, supported, talk, time, time is a healer, timescale, trust, worse, you’re worth it, your song

www.pexels.comIf you received a broken heart for Christmas, we really feel your pain because we know only too well that dealing with a break up can be really tough.

Whether you are feeling sad, angry, betrayed or confused, don’t worry, these are all natural responses when a relationship ends, and while we know there is no quick fix, we do have some ideas to help you get back on track again.

Press delete
Social media makes it possible to hold onto your ex for longer than you may have done in the past, so we suggest you delete them for once and for all. Yes, you might want to see what they are up to, but the more you check Facebook and Instagram, the harder it is going to be to let go, so delete them right now. Blocking might feel harsh, but it has to be better than agonising who that girl is in the photo and if you are still feeling upset several months down the line and they change their relationship status, you don’t want to know. So go on, do it now and ask other people not to tell you what is happening with you ex too!

Cry
Everybody hurts sometimes, so after a break up spend some time alone and have a good cry, get those feelings out there and yes, feel sorry for yourself, it’s allowed.

Give it time
Whether you were the one to make the break, or the one who was dumped, you need time to get over the end of a relationship. You have been on holiday together, maybe shared a home, have the same friends and then there’s ‘your song’ and none of those things are going to be erased in a few days. Time is a healer, so give yourself that space and over the coming weeks and months, things will get easier and you will start to see the sunshine again.

Talk about it
Yes, you will want to be alone to heal your pain, but you don’t want to become a recluse. Spending time talking to the friends and family you love and who make you smile, is so important and will help you feel connected and supported. Whether you talk about your break up, the reasons why or what to do next, chatting with people you trust not only gives you another point of view, but it can be a distraction from your thoughts which can be a huge help. Try not to bottle things up as that can make things worse and if you get to the point when you just can’t see the wood for the trees, maybe speak to your GP.

Get moving
Yes, watch those sad films and get into bed with your hot water bottle and onesie, but it is also important to get up and move about. Having those feel good endorphins pumping around your body can be a great way to heal and help you to move forward. Going for a run, taking a dance class or jumping on your bike can all help deal with your stress levels, boost your mood and you will be distracted from your heartache.

Treat yourself
After a breakup you might not want to do anything nice for yourself but it is one way to reboot, and you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else again. Now is the time to treat yourself to something that will make you feel good, and whether it is a facial, coffee with friends or a trip to the cinema, doing this is key to healing and will help you to smile again. Remember – you’re worth it!

Do it in your own time
While we have given you some ideas of how to feel better, there is no timescale for this. You are human and will deal with your emotions in your own time and own way. Mending a broken heart is a marathon, not a sprint, so don’t compare yourself to anyone else, go at your own pace and as you are kinder to yourself, you will start to feel happy again.

Team Pure Beauty

Great books for a happy 2018

17 Wed Jan 2018

Posted by Stark in Life and Fashion

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#1 New York Times bestselling author, activities, Amazon, ‘Lose Weight for Good: Full-flavour cooking for a low-calorie diet’, ‘The Wellbeing Journal’, baked doughnuts with sweet five-spice dust, beautiful pages, block to happiness, books, buy me, drawing prompts, exercise routines, fallen in love, Fat-Loss Plan, Favourites, fit, fitter, four million followers, Gabrielle Bernstein, gorgeous book, grounded, happier, healthier, healthy body, home, inner peace, inspirational quotes, January, Joe Wicks, Judgement Detox: Release the Beliefs That Hold You Back from Living a Better Life, Kate Moss, lean, life coach, Lily Cole, look after yourself, lose weight, low-fat recipes, meditating, mental health charity, Michelin-starred chef, mind, modern day, motivated, Nadia Narain and Katia Narain Phillips, New Year, personal weight loss journey, recipes, regular hot baths, Self Care for the Real World, self preservation, share, Sienna Miller, six-step programme, social media, start, steak taco with lime salsa, sticky pork chops, sweet potato and black bean burritos, sweet treats, Tom Kerridge, veggie super bowl, warm halloumi salad, work clothes, yoga

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It’s the start of a new year so if you go into any bookshop or look online there are a whole host of books promising a healthier, fitter, happier you.

We thought we would share our favourites, so you can buy something you think will work for you.

With an enthusiasm for life and an impressive mop of dark curls, Joe Wicks has yet another book out in 2018. Inside the glossy cover of his ‘Fat-Loss Plan’ are a series of recipes and exercise routines that are designed to help you achieve a fit, lean and healthy body. We love the steak taco with lime salsa, we are pretty partial to his goodness packed veggie super bowl and are impressed that he has included some sweet treats to keep you motivated on those dark January nights. With more than four million followers on social media, we are pretty sure this book will be as much of a success as the others.

With endorsements from Kate Moss, Sienna Miller and Lily Cole, it is little wonder that ‘Self Care for the Real World’ is flying off book shelves around the world. Sisters, Nadia Narain and Katia Narain Phillips, use this book to get to the heart of how to look after yourself if you often putting others first. From changing out of your work clothes when you get home, to having regular hot baths and meditating, this fantastic book shows you that even when the waves of life are high, you can keep grounded and well. We think this self-preservation read has ‘buy me’ written all over it.

For something a bit different, we love the Judgement Detox: Release the Beliefs That Hold You Back from Living a Better Life. By Gabrielle Bernstein, a life coach and #1 New York Times bestselling author, this book explores the notion of being judged as well as judging others, something that is part of modern-day and a block to happiness for many. Bernstein uses a six-step programme that includes yoga, meditation and other healing teachings to allow readers to let go of judgement and find inner peace.

Even if you don’t want to lose weight, Michelin-starred chef, Tom Kerridge has a new book out full of low-fat recipes that are beyond tasty. His experiences in the kitchen have been blended with a personal weight loss journey and the results on the pages of ‘Lose Weight for Good: Full-flavour cooking for a low-calorie diet’ are amazing. The warm halloumi salad, sweet potato and black bean burritos and sticky pork chops are good but for us the winner has to be the baked doughnuts with sweet five-spice dust. Genius!

Journaling isn’t anything new, but we have fallen in love with the ‘The Wellbeing Journal’ that’s been created in partnership with the mental health charity, Mind. The beautiful pages of this gorgeous book include activities, drawing prompts, inspirational quotes together with space for writing and reflecting on your thoughts so you can have a more creative, positive life.

Team Pure-Beauty

Clean up your make-up act

13 Wed Sep 2017

Posted by Stark in Life and Fashion

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Baby shampoo, bag, bar, base, bathroom, beauty staples, bin, brushes, change colour, clear, cool, cream-based foundations, crumble, dark, day, die, dry, dry naturally, dry up, evening, eye, eye infection, formula, G&T, game over, gentle liquid soap, good to go, life is busy, light reflecting particles, lip liners, lipstick, make-up bag, Mascara, mix, nail varnish, prone to clumping, Pure Beauty, re-infection, replaced, shake, share, sheer, smell, smoothly, SPF, synthetic, tip, winter

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We use our make-up bags every day, often more than once, but how often do you clean it and clear it out?

Made you think, didn’t we?

The reality is, life is busy, time is short and with a G&T with your name on it at the bar, you don’t want to spend your time sorting out old mascaras, but you need to.

Today we are looking at just how long you should keep your beauty staples, before throwing them in the bin and replacing them with something shiny and new.

First things first, take everything out of your bag, clean and dry it and if it has seen better days, buy a new one. This is also the perfect time to wash your brushes. Baby shampoo is brilliant for natural hair brushes and a gentle liquid soap does the job for the synthetic ones. Brushes really can be a breeding ground for germs, so wash them once a week to be safe. Rather than storing them in the bottom of your bag, keep brushes tip up in pot and allow them to dry naturally.

Next, sort out the products in front of you and anything that you haven’t used for a while, that is past its best or has had the top left off, should be replaced. It is also worth noting, if you’ve had an eye infection it’s a good idea to throw out make-up that could cause a re-infection. Oh, and if you want your stuff to last, don’t store it in the bathroom but somewhere cool, dark and dry.

The shelf life for foundation changes depending on the formula, but generally cream-based foundations last between six months to a year, and if there’s an SPF it tends to be less. Always pay attention to how your foundation looks and feels on your skin and if you notice that is starts to change colour or smell, it is time to ditch it. Also remember, as we head towards winter, you might want to swap your lighter sheer foundation for a stronger base but go for a product with light reflecting particles.

Ideally a mascara is good to go for around four months. After this time, they tend to become dry and prone to clumping, and using the same brush over and over can increase the risk of eye infections.

We all tend to have a different lipstick in every bag, ones for day, others for evening and ones we never even wear. This is totally fine but just make sure you keep them clean and if you come across one that is past it’s best, chuck it away and use another one. Oh, and don’t share them!

Eye and lip liners can last up to three years but it is likely you will use them before that, or they will dry up and crumble. Again, don’t pass these around on a night out and at the first sign of dehydration, bin and buy a new one.

Nail varnish is one of those products that never seems to die, but shake it and if the colour doesn’t completely mix or the varnish is too sticky to apply smoothly, it’s game over.

Got a tip we have missed, then get in touch and let us know.

Team Pure Beauty

Grab a great holiday read

21 Wed Jun 2017

Posted by Stark in Life and Fashion

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50-year-olds, advice, Anna Akana, band members, beautiful cousin, best reads, best-selling, Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty, big screen, blushes, book, brilliant read, brutally honest, camp counsellors, Camp Marigold, cocktail, commentary, Cornwall, danger, debut novel, Englishman, escapism, fashion, flight, friendship, G&T, hat, hate, highly engaging, Hollywood beach babe, imagined, instruction manual, iPad, journey, Kindle, laughter, London, love, lover, Mandy Berman, Modern Lovers by Emma Straub, My Cousin Rachel by Daphne Du Maurier, mysterious, nostalgia, Paige Toon, paper, partner, passport, people, Perennials, perfect, pool bar, poolside, power, prose, put down, quirky journalist, relationship blog, shades, share, shelves, So Much I Want to Tell You: Letters to My Little Sister, story, students, suicide prevention, summer 2017, tale, talent, tears, The Duchess by Danielle Steel, The Last Piece of My Heart, tickets, tissues, transatlantic flight, travel, younger sister, YouTube channel

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Whether you use a Kindle, iPad or are still a lover of paper, having something good to read when you are on holiday takes you to a whole new level of escapism.

A book is the perfect way to get through a flight (add a G&T), is the perfect poolside partner and if you get stuck on the way home, you can read away the hours.

We have had a look at some of the best reads out there for Summer 2017 and wanted to share them with you.

If you are looking for a little nostalgia, look no further than Mandy Berman’s debut novel, Perennials. This easy to relate to friendship story reunites Rachel Rivkin and Fiona Larkin at Camp Marigold, but as camp counsellors rather than students. This is a summer of heat, flagged by the past, flamed by the present and page by page the thrill and pain of growing up becomes apparent from a writing with endless talent and perfect prose.

OK, it’s not new but if you haven’t read Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty, where have you been? If you are looking for a book you won’t be able to put down (perfect for a transatlantic flight), download this totally addictive read. Love, hate, danger, power, fashion, it’s all there for the taking people.

Another coming of age book is on the shelves this summer and this time it is Modern Lovers by Emma Straub. This is the tale of three friends, who also happen to be ex-band members, who are now old enough to have kids doing the things they remember, only too well, themselves doing. This time it might be 50-year-olds coming together but they do it in a style that beats any Hollywood beach babe who might be on the next lounger.

Maybe not the lightest read on the shelves right now, but So Much I Want to Tell You: Letters to My Little Sister by Anna Akana, is a brilliant read. After her younger sister killed herself, Anna started what is now, a 1.8-million strong brutally honest, highly engaging YouTube channel that cleverly combines advice with commentary and has a deep emphasis on suicide prevention. This outstanding first book is part memoir, part instruction manual, and it is equally as compelling as Anna herself, but have the tissues ready!

If you want a mix of laughter, tears and travel, it has to be Paige Toon’s latest novel, The Last Piece of My Heart. Bridget a quirky journalist has decided to turn her popular relationship blog into a book, however, after a number of painful rejections she gets a very different proposition. From London to Cornwall and further onto Thailand, readers join her on an unexpected journey into the unknown and what unfolds is better than she could have ever of imagined.

Out at the end of June, The Duchess by Danielle Steel hit the shelves. If anyone can write a really good beach book, it’s the fourth best-selling fiction author of all time. This time she brings us the story of how a high-class British lady becomes a French madam and it’s all there for the taking. We can’t wait to get our hands on this, but may need shades and a hat to hide our blushes.

To end this round-up we are going for a classic, My Cousin Rachel by Daphne Du Maurier. Currently out on the big screen, this is the tale of a young Englishman who plots revenge against his mysterious, beautiful cousin, believing that she murdered his guardian. But his feelings take a turn and this fabulous page, turning mystery-drama will keep you guessing to the end of your cocktail at the pool bar.

So, pack your passport, tickets and sun cream, buy your books and relax.

Team Pure Beauty

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