First Date Rules

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Whether you are meeting up as the result of an app, website or are being set up by friends, going on a first date can be a nerve-wracking experience.

We know it can be tough, so have put together some tips on how to get things right so you can save your blushes, and get away with your respect intact if things aren’t working out the way you hoped they would.

Manage Your Expectations
Even before you agree to a time and place to meet, it is a good idea to just take stock of the situation. While love, at first sight, can happen, in many cases you aren’t going to a proposal over that initial cocktail. High expectations are great, but they can create pressure and if the desired connection isn’t made, you can feel disappointed and despondent. See each date as the chance to meet someone new and take it from there and don’t have the Tiffany website on your phone just in case.

Think of Your Safety
We know your date is all about having fun, but you do need to think about safety, so plan to meet for the first time in a public place be that a bar, restaurant or bowling alley. Let a friend you trust know about your plans and call or text them when you are back home. It is easy to get carried away with the romance of a first date but there can be dangers out there so there is no harm in exercising caution at the beginning of something new. You might also want to have a friend who can phone you at a set time which can give you a reason to leave if you want to and don’t drink too much alcohol as you want to be aware of what is happening around you.

Keep the Ex Chat to a Minimum
If you don’t want to put the other person off, you probably don’t want to spend the entire time talking about your ex and don’t compare them to your date. If you are back in the dating game after the end of a longterm relationship, yes it’s fine to talk about that, but going into all the gory details, or even worse crying over the one that got away, won’t do you any favours.

Be Yourself
If you want to find someone who is right for, then you need to be yourself. There is no point in putting on airs and graces to impress someone, wearing designer clothes if you love a bargain from the charity shop, or pretending to have a high-flying career and huge home if that isn’t the case. People want authenticity and honesty and even if the chemistry isn’t sizzling by the end of the evening, by being you, you might end up with a new best friend who likes you just the way you are.

Be Present
There is nothing worse than spending time with someone who isn’t present and interested. While you might need your phone for safety reasons, or to keep an eye on calls from the babysitter, why not put it in your bag and give your date 100% of your attention. Leave the texting, Tweeting, and Instagramming for later on and be in the moment while you are on your date because hopefully, that is where the magic is going to be!

Remember, They Will Be Nervous Too
Let’s be honest here and say that we know that dating can be scary, especially if you’ve been hurt in the past. Dates with someone new can be a gamble for both of you, so if they stutter or tell a bad joke, give them a chance because they might be trying to make a good impression and that bad joke may well be part of their wedding speech one day!

We hope these ideas will help ease your nerves and make you see that you need to go out with an open mind and a smile and you may just be surprised at how your first date turns out.

Pure Beauty

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Let Stress Go

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Going out and partying might all weekend seem like a good way to escape from the stress of everyday life, but while it is fun at the time, it could actually do more harm than good in the long run.

Whether it’s your boss, brother or your neighbours who are causing your problems, if you can identify the triggers and take control, you will hopefully start to feel better and have a more positive approach and outlook.

Build a Network
Bottling things up and trying to do everything alone isn’t good for anyone, so try to establish a network of people in your life who are good for you. These can be family members, friends or work colleagues who you really connect with, relax with and have a good time with and who will cheer you on when times are good and give you a lift when it gets a little cloudy.

Be Active
Yes, scrolling through social media might take your mind of things, but getting off the sofa and exercising can reduce emotional intensity, clear your thoughts and let you deal with your problems in a calmer way. Find something that you really enjoy doing, maybe buddy up with a friend and go to the gym, swim before work or take a dance class – there is something for all of us you just have to find it. As the feel good endorphins work around your body, they will take down those feelings of stress and you will start to feel empowered and able to move forwards once again

Challenge Yourself
Setting yourself goals and challenges, such as learning a language, starting a blog or playing a new sport, not only helps build confidence but reduces stress, so give it a go.

Take Some ‘Me Time’
If you work long hours and have family demands, it can be hard to take time out for you and this can add to your stress levels. If might sound selfish and indulgent, but finding time to meet with friends, relax with a book or just grab a quiet cuppa in a coffee shop, is important. Put something in your diary at the start of each week then stick to it and you will be surprised at the difference stepping back from everything can make to your life.

Give Back
When you stop thinking that everything is about you, life can change for the better. Getting involved in a local community project or volunteering your time to a cause close to your heart, can give you a new focus and give you a whole new perspective. Whether it is a visiting elderly people and reading to them, digging out a pond in the park or raising money for a children’s hospice, this can really help to take the focus away from your life and lift your mood.

Be Positive
Looking for the positives in life, and seeing the things you’re grateful for can be a real eye opener. Don’t be the glass is half empty person because your to list is growing day by day, instead see the glass is half full because you have a job you enjoy and can afford to go on holiday as well as pay your bills and eat out once a week. Simply writing down three things that went well, before you go to bed can make you start to see the good in life, rather than just looking at what is hard.

Breath
If you do nothing else, sit down, close your eyes and take five minutes out to focus on your breath and regroup. Nothing is so important on your to do list that it can’t wait just a little bit longer and meditation is a free, easy and fantastic way to deal with stress, so give it a go!

If you do feel that your stress is getting out of control, speak to your GP and ask them for some professional help.

Team Pure-Beauty

Wedding Tips for a Perfect Day

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With Prince Harry and Megan Markle set to sparkle as the say ‘I do’ in Windsor on 19 May, love is in the air.

While the Royal couple no doubt have an eye watering budget and a team of planners, stylists and photographers on hand to ensure this is an occasion the world will want to watch, not everyone has such an entourage to help plan their big day.

Fear not, we love a good wedding and have put together our top tips on planning the perfect day for you.

It’s all about the shoes
We know how important shoes are on your big day, but don’t make that the time to try them out for the first time. Once you have found the perfect pair, wear them in the house quite a bit so your feet are used to them and you don’t end up with blisters even before your first dance.

Find your tribe
Mums, aunts, sisters, brothers, friends, neighbours and work mates will all have special skills and if you ask them to give you a hand you will, in no time, have your very own wedding tribe. Not only will they help keep you grounded and relaxed, they will also want you to have a great day and be only too happy to do jobs to make things perfect.

Be kind to yourself
Shedding extra pounds is often front of mind with many brides, and grooms, but don’t make this an obsession because it could ruin your day. Make realistic goals but don’t hit the gym everyday or skip meals or you’ll be hungry and tired rather than glowing and healthy. Plan your meals, drink plenty of water and check your dress is altered before you wear it for real.

Watch that tan
If you didn’t have a hen party in Marbella to top up the tan, you might be tempted to fake it, but be careful with this one. Heavy spray tans, semi-permanent eyebrows and deep foundations might look good on Instagram brides, but if keep things natural and simple, your love with shine through, not the orange stripes on your shoulders.

Budget for everything
No one likes last-minute surprises so from the moment you get that sparkler on your finger, set your budget and stick to it. With social media sites, blogs and magazines offering inspiration and ideas, you can create something truly unique and memorable without remortgaging your home.

Remember the weather
You can plan most things, but there is no way to control Mother Nature. Keep an eye on the forecast in the lead up to the big day and prepare accordingly. If it is going to rain, organise extra umbrellas and towels for guests, and if you are looking at a heat wave, water and sun cream will be welcomed by the congregation.

Say cheese
When it comes to capturing the magic of your big day, the photos are so important so go for a professional. They don’t need to be the most expensive but check out their websites and portfolios, do a trial session and at the end of the day, it comes down to chemistry so follow your instincts at your first meeting.

Keep people happy
We know there can be family frictions and friend fallouts but this is your big day so manage those situations accordingly. Look at how best to put people together, who to keep apart and have someone keeping an eye on how much booze is being consumed, especially if it is a warm day.

Say thank you
Weddings are expensive for the guests as well as the bride and groom, so be sure to send out thank you cards so everyone knows how much they were appreciated.

Most of all, have fun, make memories and enjoy it because it will be over in a flash.

Team Beauty

Make life easy with a capsule wardrobe

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If you are looking get more, out of less, when it comes to fashion, it could be that you need a capsule wardrobe in your life.

If you’ve got more shoes than Imelda Marcos and love nothing more than buying that new jumper in every colour, streamlining might seem daunting.

The good news is, it doesn’t have to be.

The term “capsule wardrobe” was coined in the 1970s, by London boutique owner Susie Faux, and it describes a collection of wardrobe staples that will meet your fashion needs each season and they key to success is that it works for you.

Dressing this way means it is easier to decide what to wear, because you know everything in your closet looks and feels great on you. You will find your wardrobe is tidy and organised, and you spend less time working out what to wear and money buying new clothes because you know what you have works.

We have put together some simple steps to get you started, and we have a feeling you won’t look back.

Do your research
Be it from magazines, websites, friends or social media, look for ideas and inspiration and create a mood board for your new capsule wardrobe.

What’s your style?
As well as making life easier, the capsule wardrobe is also designed to help you find your own personal style. Maybe you have a love of the 1970s, like to keep up with the catwalks or possible hanker for a more boho look – whatever it is, keep your eyes open for the essentials that will help you create that look for you.

Consider your lifestyle
Do think about what you like to wear. Identify all the different activities you do in your daily life (i.e. work, playing with the kids, doing the school run, working, going out with friends) and be practical about what would work when it comes to clothes.

The basics
With your research done, it is time to raid your existing wardrobe. A smart blazer, well fitting jeans, a pair of straight leg trousers, a tailored coat, a shift dress and a silk shirt are great examples of basics. You can then add statement pieces like a well cut suit and a sparkly top so you don’t get bored and remember, nothing is just for best. You are looking ideally for around 35 key pieces which you can place on a rail and then access what is missing and what you need to pull it all together.

Colours
The capsule is the foundation of your wardrobe, so we suggest keeping to neutral colours for your key pieces. Navy, olive, grey and black are the obvious starting points and you will be amazed how a pop of colour will really bring each outfit together.

Sort it out
This is the time to look at what remains in your closet. Make a pile of anything that you don’t wear and the items that don’t fit. If you know you aren’t going to wear them again, give them away and store the rest of next season. If you find you don’t use them in the next six months, clear them away for good. This isn’t being ruthless, it will simply help clear your mind and your home.

Go shopping
If you find you are missing some items make a list and when you go shopping, stick to it. Remember, a capsule wardrobe isn’t about creating a whole new you but instead reigniting your love of the clothes and finding your signature style.

Shake it up
After 3 – 6 months, or as the seasons change, you can take some items away and add others in, but as much as possible keep to those initial staples and in time you will know what works for you.

Happy sorting and enjoy your new-found fashion freedom.

Team Pure Beauty

Self Care – How To Start Loving Yourself

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There’s a very real correlation between mental health issues and not really looking after yourself properly. A lack of self-esteem, depression and Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) can all leave us feeling totally unwilling to spend any time on ourselves, and this can feed into a very self-destructive cycle. We know how difficult it can be to force yourself to love who you are, but doing little things to care for yourself each day can really help your mood to take an upswing.

Wash Regularly

One of the first things that falls by the wayside when people are depressed is regular washing, choosing instead to languish in your comfy clothes and not take care of the most basic of functions. The problem is, the less clean you are often the more depressed you feel and the more depressed you feel, the harder it is to get yourself sorted. It may take all of your strength to do it, but giving yourself a nice bath or shower can really help to set you on the path to feeling better.

Look At Yourself Through Someone Else’s Eyes

If you’ve got issues with low self esteem, it can be really difficult to have a subjective opinion of yourself, because you’re internally programmed to just hate what you see. Try to look in the mirror each day and refuse to listen to the internal voice which cuts you down, but instead try to look at yourself through someone elses eyes. Training your brain to think differently, in the style of “someone else might think I have nice eyes” “someone else would probably love my thick hair” can really bolster your confidence.

Take Time For Yourself

When you’re feeling down, there’s a tendency to feel like shutting yourself away and doing very little, but getting out and about and doing something for yourself can create a real upswing for you mood. Take yourself for a walk, go and have a coffee, get your nails or hair done – it’s all minor stuff to most people but it will feel like you’ve conquered Everest if you do it, and you’ll have the added bonus of having nice hair or nails in the bargain.

Accept Help

If you’re lucky enough to have people around you who want to help, LET THEM! It can be very easy to isolate oneself and shrink away from offers of help from other people when we’re feeling low, but allowing people in can lift a weight from your shoulders, which in turn can help lift your mood. They say that “misery loves company”, but sometimes misery can go a long way to being cured with just a little bit of company.